Uh, hi.

/wave

Um, I really don’t know what to write.  I mean…okay, look…I applied for the summer internship program, I thought I was going to be like…you know…filing…or something.  So, I really don’t know what to write about.

I live in Mulgore.  Have you been to Mulgore?  Nothing happens there.  I’m a Tauren, we’re actually quite boring.  We hunt wild Kodo.  Have you ever met a Kodo that was “wild?”  Me neither.  I can’t wait to get out of this place…but I’m way too scared to actually leave.  I’m not like my Uncle Ludo, who got to roam around the Labyrinth with Mrs. McHotenstien, tackling David Bowie and ripping peoples heads off, you know?  I’m just…I’m a druid…I cleanse things.  I make things well again.

You know…boring.

Um, this is me:

Any way, I’m still trying to figure out what to write about, so if any of you faithful readers out there have any clues, please email me at Snowman.TheDruid@gmail.com.  Thank you, and hopefully I’ll have something to write about in the near future.

/shrug

ANNOUNCEMENT: NEW STAFF WRITER

Hello wonderful readers, it’s been a while since I’ve been able to update this online newsletter due to a fascination with my Pally Alt, and for that I apologize. I will strive to be more attentive to my Pagemaster duties and update the guild on all things Warcraft, and continue to develop and improve our guild website.

With that being said, I’ve recruited some help from the land of the Kodo, a young druid from Mulgore named Snowman, to help me keep this newsletter full of exciting content for all of you to enjoy on a more regular basis. So, please don’t be too hard on him, he’s still quite new to this world.

Things in the near future:

WALL OF SHAME
Will be updated shortly…this has taken a while due to the amount of material you have all been providing me, ya’ll don’t let me down that’s for sure.

VET OF THE WEEK
This will happen again, and when it does, we here at the Tasty Cupcake will be there to get answers from these 15-minutes-of-fame-celebrities.

NEW FEATURES TO THE GUILD SITE
Yes, I will be adding stuff…it should be fun.

Cheers.

For Shame

That’s right ladies and gentlemen, this weeks addition of “The Wall of Shame” is brought to you by the letter “H,” for “Hellsbells forgot to put it on ‘Master Looter’ before we downed Malygos causing the looting process to take an additional 10 minutes, which we could have used on Sartharion.”

So let’s all put our hands to our foreheads for a unified facepalm.

I pity the foo’ who don’t ‘member ha da put it on Masta Loota! – Mr. T

Congratulations there Guild Master, you deserve it!

To Achieve Undeath

After almost six straight weeks of gearing peeps in 10-man Naxxramus, a group of guildies and I decided to quest for “The Undying” title this last Friday night, rather than run our normal 10-man. We came really close too–the only death during a boss fight was caused by a DC (dis-connection from the WoW Server), not due to player error–we felt robbed by Blizzard, and opened a ticket (all of us), to find out that though GM’s can do quite a lot in game to help you out when schidt happens, they cannot give you achievements as they are unlocked “in-game.” “Oy-vey” says the hunter.

Nonetheless, we were able to get quite a few achievements, including Arachnophobia, Make Quick Werk Of Him, and The Safety Dance. It was an overall good night. We cleared Naxxramus through Kel’Thuzad in 2.5 hours; a job well done–despite the fact that we all forgot to take off our resist gear after downing Sarth.

/facepalm

I don’t suspect we’ll be gunning for “The Undying” title for another week or so, but I’m sure we will again. For now, it’s time to get back to taking names and gearing our peeps, “and we’re all out of bubble gum.” O_o

Do Two Boomkins Make a Raid?

Last night that question was put to the test to disastrous results, as the sight of a second boomkin caused the other to commit suicide via Grobbulus.  Now, one might try to place blame on a desire to re-inact Leeroy Jenkins going poorly, or a run-away-auto-run-button, but I’d like to think that this lemming-like behavior was brought on by a genetic defect in Tauren physiology, after having changed shapes so many times.

/shrug

No, two boomkins don’t make a raid.  In fact, we had two warlocks too.  And two hunters.  Three priests, several paladin’s, a couple shaman, a rogue or two, a death knight, and some pretty intimidating tanks.  It takes 25 heroes to make a raid, and it takes 25 people to make them.  After a week and a half break from raiding we were back into it last night.  We hit a wall right in the beginning with Sartharion and his drakes, but we didn’t let that keep us down and we moved into Naxxramus.  Ruscared kept us going with the best movies ever and we did something that we haven’t done in a long time when raiding.  We laughed.

There were a lot of old faces and some new in our digital dungeon last night and some good gear was dropped, I for one got a pair of pants that I didn’t even know I wanted, until I got it.  It’s like in real life, when I bought my favorite pair of chones.  I saw them in the store and they were electric blue, caught my eye from across the room.  As I approached them, shaking with giddy joy for the Tron-like underwear, I noticed that the blue was actually a design on them, and as I got closer, it became clearer that the design was a paisley pattern.  This immediately discouraged me and I almost turned back towards the DVD’s, when I decided to take a closer look at the electric blue marvel, and I saw that it wasn’t a paisley pattern at all, it was a whole bunch of dragons.

DRAGONS!

I immediately bought the underwear, and own them still today.  In fact, I think I’m going to wear them tomorrow.   Yes, I’m going to wear them; it’s decided.

Far to often though, I find that I take this game a little too seriously, and have to give myself a mental check.  But last night…last night is why I play.  We talked, we joked, we laughed, we downed bosses, and we geared people who needed it.  So, thank you Noir, it was a blast, and I’m looking forward to kicking Malygos’s, Sartharion’s, and Thaddius’s butts tonight.

“I Thought it Was a Mage Table.”

Lucidius, of Fizzcrank

While clearing Naxxramus this week Lucidius, an officer in the guild of Noir, decided to put on the “Newb-Hat” and click on a portal to Orgrimmar, causing the need to summon him back–and since he was the only warlock in the raid that evening–his fellow guildies had to run back to the stone outside of the instance and risk pulling all of the slimes outside of Grobulus again.

So foolish – Lady Sylvanis Windrunner.

More on this as our story develops.

Tanks Found! Malygos Downed!

We’d like to release an official apology for our statements made earlier today about the possibility of the Lich King kidnapping tanks around Northrend.  As it turns out, something called “real life” was the reason behind these mysterious disappearances.

A full scale investigation has been issued and we here at The Tasty Cupcake will not rest until we get to the bottom of this tank gone-missing crisis.

Northrend Kidnappings

TANK’S GONE MISSING IN AZEROTH

DALARAN CITY, CRYSTALONG: It is an act that hasn’t been seen for a long time in Azeroth, with the Lich King on the move, and the world being overrun by the Scourge, a kidnapping was the last thing anyone would have expected.  But recently, all over Northrend, Tanks are going unheard from and missing.

Yeah, last night, I was just stepping out of The Filthy Animal when I got an urgent message from a fellow horde.  We had no tanks!  They were supposed to be there, but they weren’t.  We were just left there, stranded in front of Malygos.  We were left to die.  Nobody knows where they were, they were kidnapped…I’m certain of it.  –Milanga, Tauren Druid

And this isn’t the only occurrence of a tank gone missing in recent days–could this be the work of the Lich King?  Could Arthus be dealing his most deadliest of blows?  We can’t be certain.  If we don’t find our tanks soon, the gates of Ulduar will open with no one left to defend us from the darkness within.

But, on a more comforting note, not all of the tanks have gone missing, there is still hope.  I here a level 20 paladin just soloed Ragefire.